|Fuck you, 40!|
1. I got injured and developed CRPS so exercise is almost completely out of the question. Fuck you, nerve disorder! I can blame CRPS for at least part of my fat ass can't I? I mean if I didn't have CRPS I would be able to do yoga like I used to and maybe I would be all svelt and stuff.
2. I <3 food way too much. Y'all if I could roll around in a pool filled with Key Lime Pie filling and eat my way out, I totally would. Then I'd jump into the pool filled with whipped cream. The real kind too, not that Cool Whip shit.
|Oh yeah. Source: Jason Merritt/Getty Images North America|
5. Wait. What were we talking about?
6. I love lists.
|Gimme some of that yogurt or just John Stamos. Whatever.|
8. Why does John Stamos look better than me? He probably works out huh? I wonder how old he is.
9. Holy shit! I just looked it up and he is 48! Now I'm really depressed. He's 8 years older than me and looks 10 years younger than me. Thanks a lot Uncle Jesse! Way to make a girl feel good. I hope you're proud of yourself sir.
10. I think you see now why I'm dreading my 40th birthday. I don't look like John Stamos. Fuck.
Well clearly it's time to take my medication. I don't even understand this post. Wish me luck on my impending 40-ness, kids. I need it.